Not Everything You Lose Is A Loss

Dear Someone,

This letter is for you, you that have chosen to love in silence just because you find no rejection in it. You whose friendship, love, help, and service was rejected and left with more scars. You that was rejected for being different and for being you. You that’s wondering and asking how many times will it be possible for you to be rejected before every piece of you will finally be broken. You whose love was abused but still hoping against all reason that the one that rejected you will somehow come back to you. This letter is for you, you that have rejected yourself because of your looks and self-destructive thoughts.

As someone that knows what it means to be rejected, I don’t wish to be everything to you, you that stumbled on this letter, but I do wish to be something to someone that can relate with it and ready to beat rejection. That’s because every single one of us faces rejection and I know how it feels — being ignored, compared, replaced, left for another or rejected over and over again always feels like true sadness — it super hurts, it can damage your self-esteem, it can take away your desire to walk, eat or talk, and it’s difficult to swallow by anyone.

I don’t know who has rejected you and what for but I want you to know that not getting what you want in life is always a blessing in disguise. Don’t allow how you are feeling right now drive you over the edge. Don’t allow it to destroy your ambitions and dreams. Don’t become frustrated and start begging for love from the wrong places as there are certain people who are not meant to fit in your life, no matter how much you want them to be. Allow God to help you by embracing that humiliation in good faith. Allow this feeling of rejection and abandonment to be a part of your learning curve and road to success.

If your love was rejected by the very person you loved the most, if for any reason you were betrayed by someone closest to you, count it all joy instead of blaming yourself or going into hiding. Take it as their loss — they don’t deserve you. If your hand of fellowship or friendship was rejected by a stranger or anyone, when you told them you didn’t want to be anything more than just friends, count it all joy instead of feeling bad. If your unsolicited help was rejected out of ego or ignorance and squandered, don’t get cross and don’t get upset about it. Count it all joy and respect yourself. If your script or audition was rejected, count it all joy, don’t give up and don’t run out of wine. Always believe in your story or acts knowing that not everyone can recognize potentials. Work to make it better knowing that it will only take one yes for men to start coming to your rising.

If you were rejected for a job, or internship that you really wanted, don’t cry and don’t give up on yourself because you never know God’s plan. Instead, see every rejection as a redirection to something bigger and better. And who knows, that rejection could actually be a miracle in the making. If you are one of those who looks in a mirror and rejects yourself, don’t blame society because you rejected yourself first before anybody else did. Don’t continue to be your own worst enemy knowing that rejection from others can only hurt to the amount that you’ve already rejected yourself. Don’t become someone that you are not because of the fear of being rejected or of not being good enough. Instead, let go of all the reasons why you reject yourself, and you will grow to love yourself.

If you’re reading this letter and you’re lonely, walking your own path because you were rejected by your family or by your children, I encourage you not to hide yourself in a costume or spend the rest of your life as a ghost, that’s not sure where home is anymore. Though I understand that the worst form of rejection is when you feel rejected, misunderstood, undervalued, ostracised, shamed and given silent treatment by your own family, don’t blame anyone for what has happened and don’t ever think that God is not aware of your pains. He does! While this might be a hard time for you, realise that you can’t choose your own family but you can make an excellent choice on who becomes part of your life going forward. So continue to maintain a positive attitude in this difficult time. Continue to be a better version of you. Keep pushing and keep trying. Pray, give thanks, forgive, be kind, be humble, and ask God to give you strength. He gives grace not because we are amazing, but because HE is!

Irrespective of the nature of that rejection I want you to always remember that every rejection in life signals you are off to a great start. And whether you know it or not, that rejection is going to make your life better because not everything you lose is a loss. Today, you might be tired of being rejected by everything and everyone but that’s part of life — it shows you who is truly going to be there for you at such a time as this and if you will be there for yourself as well too. Focus on what lies ahead of you. Focus on the path that you must follow. One day you will be grateful for every rejection. You might be tired of being seen as not good enough or something but don’t allow the humiliation change who you are. Don’t let it prevent you from going to where you have never been before.

You might be tired of being always considered as second best and overlooked all the times but don’t allow your soul to become a breeding ground for bitterness, anger, cynicism, coldness, and rage. Don’t allow your wounded pride prevent you from pursuing your dreams. You might be tired of caring for others and not being cared for in return but don’t allow it cause you to become lonely and broken. See it as the test that it is, and don’t get tired of caring for others.

When David’s father did not find him qualified to be king, God remembered him. David said in 1 Chronicles 28:4 (NET), “The Lord God of Israel chose me out of my father’s entire family to become king over Israel and have a permanent dynasty. Indeed, he chose Judah as leader, and my father’s family within Judah, and then he picked me out from among my father’s sons and made me king over all Israel”. It doesn’t matter who has found you not to be qualified and it doesn’t matter if you are thinking that you’re not good enough for someone, always remember that God created you just the way you are and for a purpose.

When Gideon didn’t find himself qualified, God qualified him because nothing is beyond His Grace. In Judges 6:15-16 (NLT), Gideon asked the Lord, 15 “How can I rescue Israel? My clan is the weakest in the whole tribe of Manasseh, and I am the least in my entire family!” 16 The Lord said to him, “I will be with you. And you will destroy the Midianites AS IF you were fighting against ONE MAN”. It doesn’t matter if you are the least in your family, or if you have a messy past, God can qualify you for anything because nothing is beyond His Grace. Not your lineage, family, background, financial status, skin colour or your worst mistakes can be beyond His Grace.

When Moses was rejected by his own people that he wanted to rescue, he had to run for his dear life, went into exile and became an alien in another country but God appeared to him in the burning bush and made him a leader. Acts 7:32-35 (TLB) says, 32 “’I am the God of your ancestors–of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.’ Moses shook with terror and dared not look. 33 “And the Lord said to him, ‘Take off your shoes, for you are standing on holy ground. 34 I have seen the anguish of my people in Egypt and have heard their cries. I have come down to deliver them. Come, I will send you to Egypt.’ 35 And so God sent back the same man his people had previously rejected by demanding, ‘Who made you a ruler and judge over us?’ Moses was sent to be their ruler and saviour”.

You might have been rejected, underrated, undervalued and debased, but you are not finished. Just because someone rejects you doesn’t mean you’re finished, it doesn’t mean you are without help. Just because someone doesn’t like your work doesn’t mean it’s bad. Nothing that has ever happened to you can change God’s Word and His plans for you. Romans 9:16 (TLB) says, “God’s blessings are not given just because someone decides to have them or works hard to get them. They are given because God takes pity on those he wants to”. The Message Translation (MSG) says, “Compassion doesn’t originate in our bleeding hearts or moral sweat, but in God’s mercy”. Get insurance with God, keep company with knowing that you will be accepted, uplifted, promoted and celebrated when it’s your morning and when your day has come.

No matter how you feel right now, get up, dress up, and show up not because you were accepted but because you have accepted yourself. And if someone rejected you, keep moving. Don’t let their rejection stop you from actually being happy. Life is all about loving and giving back. Being rejected by people doesn’t always mean you are not accepted by God. He actually selects the rejected. And if you have experienced being rejected so many times, don’t get used to it and don’t accept it as your lot in life. Don’t allow the fear or feelings of being rejected keep you from asking questions, from knocking on new doors, from expressing your love for anyone, from exercising your faith in God and most importantly, from sharing the good news of His saving Grace.

Until tomorrow, always remember that life begins at the end of your comfort zone. That rejection you are facing is not a sign for you to give up on yourself, on your dreams and on God. See it as an opportunity to demonstrate the character of God in you and to show forth His Glory in your life. Embrace the beauty that comes with being rejected, misunderstood, hurt and unseen by people. Let it teach you to rely on God knowing that you are never alone. Most importantly, don’t let someone who gave up on their dreams talk you out of yours.

If you love someone, or want someone, tell them but don’t try to convince them to love or want you back knowing that it took you all your adult life to learn to love yourself. If you have an idea or a dream, pursue it until it becomes a reality. When people say you can’t, prove them wrong. If you desire a job, apply for it. Put your ego aside and don’t be scared of rejection. Put your fears aside and don’t think you’re not qualified for the good things of life. Trust your gut and if you were rejected, learn from it.

On a final note, never forget that challenges will come as a result of every form of rejection. When that happens, don’t go around whining, complaining and worrying about it especially if they are things that are outside of your control. Instead, realise that when God wants to promote you and change your estate, everything around you will make no sense. You will be rejected by your family and friends. You will be hated, criticized, mocked, and sold if possible. You will be prosecuted and everyone will be against you. But Psalms 118:22 (NLT) says, “The stone rejected by the builders has now become the cornerstone”. So, let go of the disappointments, setbacks and rejections in your life and hang on to the promises of God for your future.

Don’t allow how you have been treated cause you to doubt God’s Word. Be like Moses who was rejected (at birth), and worst still, he was a murderer, yet God used him. Be like Joseph who was rejected but when his wait was over, he was promoted (Gen 41:39-41). When you get pushed out and rejected, don’t cry. Job was rejected, yet he clung to God’s goodness while all his worldly joys were stripped away. Jeremiah was rejected and so was Jesus Christ too but God still used them all. Jesus took on flesh, and He dealt with the same things as we do. Even today, He knows what pain is, He knows what hurt is, and He knows what rejection is. He knows what it is to be ridiculed, lied about and unaccepted. Jesus knows what you’re going through because He was here. Let all these be your motivation today and your testimony in that situation. Don’t stay in denial, go to Him, and He will never reject you.

Don’t let anyone or anything rob you of your joy today! Restoration is coming — from everything that ever made you cry! Something “immediate” is on its way! Whatever it is that you have been waiting for, we declare that your waiting is over. Those things that need to turn, we declare for them to turn in the Name of Jesus! Today, suddenly upon suddenly, every time and all the time, may God remember you in Jesus Name.

May someone hug you so tight one day that all your broken pieces will stick back together. May God give you strength to press on whenever you are rejected. May He teach you to know that every rejection is just a step to a bigger and better acceptance. May God give you favour to be preferred and not rejected. May He make you highly favoured in places you have been rejected previously in Jesus Name. May God comfort you, you that’s grieving, lonely, depressed, in pain and/or feeling rejected. May His love heal your heart and restore your soul. May He bring healing and reconciliation in the way ONLY He can.

In His Grip,

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I hope that you’ll take the time to follow, like, tag a friend and share some of your thoughts and experiences with Vistas of Hope Community. I’ll be looking forward to hearing what you have to say if you have ever felt rejected before by those closest to you and if you have any questions, please ask!!

2 thoughts on “Not Everything You Lose Is A Loss

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